name: min
dob: 18.may.1986
interests: finding cute pigs
email:a1sh1teru1314@hotmail.com
others:you cannot understand me

likes being:
|paradoxical:melancholic:alone|
loves:
|pigs:singing:writing:sleeping|
hates:
|superficiality:noise:irritants|
indulges in:
|music:earl grey tea:rainy day naps:anything black|


drop me a tag,if you wanna be heard.in case you wanna make those uncouth comments,this tagboard is very selective indeed. =)

Note: I've tried signing up on the website to contact the artists,but apparently it blocked my ISP.well,if there's anyone who wish to contact me regarding the artpieces,please email me. =)

my header image-
Credits: X_V_lll by bionics7

adopt your own virtual pet!

I know how the road of loneliness goes,
you need not console me...n do not take it to heart...i was only a little hurt...




[The Spring Flower of the story floats from that Year you were Borned..
Swinging on a Swing Of Childhood,following Memories always Swaying till Now..]


===Friends===
::Junhao::
::Jer::
::Gege::
::YoVoNNe::
::Melvyn::
::Nash::
::Justin::
::Cheese::
::Mark::
::Daniel::
::Danny::
::Ivan::
::Huizhu::
::Tien::
::Xiaotian::
::Yinlong::
::Erica::
::Shuxian::
::Shundeng::
::Lionel::
::Raj::
::Jonathan::
::Jasper::
:: Harry =P::


===OINKYLINKS===
QUIZZES!!
X-JAPAN's songs
Know ur Neighbours
Rotten Pics
Friendster
Upload ur pics


==RANTS OF THE OINK==



PIGs are the fundamental blocks of cuteness...
do not argue with me, u will not win!!
*rabbit hops*
*rabbit jumps abt*
eats carrots.. YUMYUM~~



Hahaha..finally found my metal pig.
Courtesy of Mingvert. =)



I LOVE ALL MY PIGS!



I draw better than this on paper,but what can i say?
I really tried my best already.well,pigs are really the cutest. =pPp



How can I not have some real piggies?! Aren't they cute! OINKS



One Night, A Star Said to Me...
'If He Makes You Cry,
Why Don't U Leave Him?'
So,I Look Back At The Star And Said...
'Star..Would U Ever Leave Ur Sky?'




Two teardrops were floating down the river.
One teardrop said to the other,
"I'm the teardrop of a girl who loved a man and lost him."
"Who are you?"
"I'm the teardrop of the man who regrets letting a girl go..."


A Story I Loved..
Love Story between Slorr and Flyndance


I met her on the net. How?
I can't remember but it seems to me that
it is this 'little theory' which I declared
in the cyberspace that caught her attention.
If I have a million dollars,
I would buy a house.
Do I have a million?No.
That's why I don't have a house.
If I have wings,I can fly.
Do I have wings?No.
So I can never fly.
If all the waters are drawn out
of Pacific Ocean,but it still can't put off
the flame of love between us.
Can all the waters of Pacific Ocean be drawn off?No.
That's why I don't love you.

That's me,a typical science student.
First you come up with an assumption,
then you fit a suitable conclusion.

If the proposed assumption doesn't stand at all,
then everything is just bullshit.
I guess this is what they call "unromantic".

But she is an exception.
She actually mailed me and said that
I am an interesting person.

Interesting?
What a word to use on me,
it's like using faithfulon Bill Clinton.
I thought this girl must be a low-IQ organism,
or suffering from serious brain damage.

Anyway,her nick doesn't seem so bad
-FLYNDANCE- that's quite a unique one.

But,I was warning myself:
hello, this is the virtual world of the Internet.
Who knows what might be lurking
behind a beautiful nick??

Speaking from experience,
most of the time it will be a
dinosaur in disguise.
The only differences will be whether
is it a carnivore or a herbivore but,
I know she is way different from a dinosaur?
She is special..

So I guess its time for the appearance of FlyNDance.

Ever since she mailed to tell me
that I am interesting?I was always
hoping to meet her in #AJCRR.
Too bad,lady luck was just not on my side.
So I can only reply her letter to tell her
that I will start to train myself to
become an interesting person,
just to show that she is far-sighted.

She replied my reply,
I replied her reply to my reply,
and she again replied my reply to her reply
blah blah blah...
Oh no, I just started a chain-reaction.

Actually,what interested me the most
is this paragraph she wrote in one of the mails...

I dance swiftly,amidst the crowd.
Your glance on me be it surprise,
be it admiration,it ain't going to stop my rhythm.
Because it is not your glance
that made me dance, it is my heart of youth...

I simply cannot relate this girl
to any of the dinosaurs.
But if she really is a dinosaur,
I am willing to let her have her fill.

Tye,my best pal unfortunately,
noticed my little affair with FlyNDance,
and has been perpetually warning me about this.

HELLO!You don't even know what she looks like,
why take the risk??Maybe she is a guy!?

I can't blame Tye for his ignorance.
Ever since he was dumped by Sally in Sec 4,
he has become a renowned playboy...

As the saying goes:Once bitten,Twice shy...

In this case,after Tye was bitten,
he has mastered the art of skinning snakes alive,
and make them into soup.
However, he got all the factors of a playboy,
I always think he is the
19 year-old version of Brad Pitt.

Tall,handsome and got this tongue that
causes diabetes in every woman he targets.
I don't think he can even remember
how many girlfriends he has had.

I went online that night,
log onto channel #AJCRR and YES!

She is there.

Before I can get over the surprise
and the daze,she sent me a message.

hey Slorr,so late liao haven't sleep ah??

Now what?Now what?
Ok ok, I had to calm down first.
I swallowed hard on my saliva,
took a few deep breaths.

Now where is that Tye when I needed him
most at such crucial moment,
somebody to tell me what to say to her.
How am I going to attract her
with my pathetic humor,which has gone stale.

slorr,me in a foul mood today.
Can't sleep, you leh??

MOTHER'S(direct translation to Chinese),
what Slorr Slorr...

Now when I read it twice in a row,
I am beginning to feel disgusted in
that nick Tye gave me.
Tye said that: who knows,
it might attract some innocent gals in talking to you?

I am not feeling very good too.
So let's be sad together...?

Finally squeezed a sentence out,
but I can already feel droplets of sweat
forming on my forehead.
Actually I am not in a bad mood,
I just wanna follow up her topic that's all.

And if she ask for the reason for my feeling down,
I can say:since you are feeling down,
how can I ever be happy??

I know it sounds mushy,but Tye said:
"MUSHINESS IS FUNDAMENTAL
TO ALL COURTSHIP."

Moreover,gals are a very weird species,
they trust their ears far more than their eyes.
So,instead of doing 10 things to impress her,
why not just say a sentence to move her.

ok,but you haven't greet me leh...

DAMNIT!
How can I forget simple manners to gals?
To think they call me MR COURTEOUS in school.

If this thing ever leaks out in school,
I would lose all my female fans.

nice to meet you,miss long-hair...

I've been wishing that she's keeping long hair...

Tye said that:
flyNDance...hmm...
she would either be longhaired or a desperado,
cos when gals dance,only two parts of them can fly:
hair and skirt.
So if she does not has long hair,
that means her skirt flies when she dances,
AH-HA!!!
This has a certain sexual hint in it...haha...

uh? How you know I got long hair??

BINGO!Heaven is on my side this time.
It goes to prove that she is not a DESPERADO.
Yes!

not only that,I also know you seldom wear skirts?

I increased the stake,
if I am correct this time,
peace on earth forever.

err...I guess you are right lor.
But how you know har??

just guess...

ok lor.Hey Slorr, tell you what,me tired liao,
you coming online tomorrow morning??

ya,why???

please please please say you coming too,
if not I am going to kill myself
for letting you go tonight.
I'll see ya tomorrow at 10 am then.
Good night...

er...should be today at 10 am...
ok...good night too...

I just blurted out a last sentence
...Offline.

Suddenly I was so impressed by
my performance just now.

But is the season of spring really arriving for me??
I wish...............

slorr...what a coincidence arh?

yeh, I am not late...

ya lor,so qiao...

Girls are weird,I thought we already
had an arrangement,
why do I have to pretend that its not?

They must have watched too many movies,
and like to think that guys they met
due to the thing called Fate is the best thing
that can happen to their love life.

slorr,you talking nonsense lah...

NONSENSE?Ok,let me tell you what is nonsense.
Summer's beach,the guy must be good at running,
with broad shoulders,
dark complexion with a tint of redness,
sparkling eyes and loud laughter.
Then he will call out loud the name of the girl,
running towards her,
carry her and spin 3 rounds anticlockwise...

slorr,you siao liaoz ahh??

I am siao?Ok,let's change a location then.
Deep in the mountains,the guy must have long hair,
gotta have the look of an artist,
carries a sketching stand,
a few pieces of drawings,
and you can see birds stop over
at his side admiring his work.
And there will be a girl who is the model,
most probably naked.

slorr,but these all very romantic mah...

ROMANTIC? Hello miss,
romance only survive in novels and movies..

In real life,the guy on the beach may step
onto broken glass or the girl may be
too heavy and tore his arm muscles.

Birds may just clear their waste
on top of the guy in the mountains,
or he might get a thrashing from the girl
because he comments on the excess fats
around the waist and hips.

slorr,you hate romance??

I hate romance?
Nope, I am just using my knowledge of statistics
to get a deduction,that guys must be TALL
to be romantic, not HANDSOME!!!
Some love novels even portrayed
the guy as normal looking,
but none dares to challenge the height of him!
I object, because I am not tall.

slorr...objection overruled...

I think I am really outstandingly bo liao,
talking to her about these until noon.

slorr,are you hungry??

ya,you leh??

yes,guess its time for lunch...Slorr...?

then do you think we should??

slorr,I am just asking.
I don't intend to have lunch with you...

ok, good.I am not romantic,
neither are you...


I had lunch with Tye.
We talk about the conversation
i had with FlyNDance this morning.

you moron.
Told her you are not romantic,you siao ah?
You have disgraced me man.
How can you make such a big mistake??

...I...I...?

Tye grabbed a chicken wing
with chopsticks and I can see the
trembling of the hand and the wing.

there are 3 Don't in chasing a girl...
One,don't forget to be romantic;
Two,don't be too honest;
Three don't be too stingy
on the sugar in our speech...

in mandarin we say
nan ren bu huai,nu ren bu ai...
you should know this...

This I know,but it has been
a controversial topic over centuries.
Women aren't really that,cheap?

So why would they only
fall for bad guys like me?
That is because bad guysare usually romantic.
Those nice guys are usually,dumdums.

Therefore,she would rather choose a
romantic bad guy rather
than any of those dumdums.
In maths we call this 2C1,understand?
Dumdum!!!

Oh,Tye is talking about maths!
Now I understand.
No wonder I have always been left on the shelf.

in another words,
gals wouldn't mind if you are not tall...
if you are not handsome...
they can bear with your inconsiderate acts...
can forget your stupidity...
but they can never forgive if you are not romantic...?

come on, this is so exaggerating...

hey,most women have a knot for romance,
just like most men have a knot for virginity.
To women they just can't understand
how precious the thin layer of membrane is to men.
Same thing,men can't imagine
how important women treats romance...

this is bullshit!
How come I've never heard of that??

the key word is knot?if you can untie it,fine.
But how many had actually succeeded in that?
Practically none!!!

ok,fine.Now I've done it.
So what should I do to remedy the situation??

face it.You are hopeless already.
I promise you I'll have a drink
with you when you and her are over...

You SON OF A BXXCH.

Midnight.
I am trying to concentrate on my physics notes.

F=ma,v=u+at...

It's really a wonder that nature can be
explained by just a few formulas and equations,
and this we call science.

Then why is astrology and palmistry
labeled as superstitions?

Science should only be one of the ways
to explain truth,what can't be explained by science,
it doesn't necessary mean that it's unreal...

Close to 1 am.
Since I can't get anything into my head,
I shall try my luck on net then.
Maybe she is there.

slorr, you are here...
Finally,good night to you...

fINALLY?
Strange word to use here.
What is she doing here at this hour?
Must be feeling down again.

yes,it is fate that brought me
to you at this moment...

I am trying very hard to convince her
that I am a bit romantic.

slorr,nothing to do with fate.
I waited for you for one hour liaoz...?

sure or not?For what??

talk to you mah or else I can't sleep..

you sick is it?Go see doctor lah...

slorr, let's continue our topic...
What do you think of relationships
that began from the Internet??

Oh my god,how should I answer her now?

it's...it's very...romantic...?

Indeed I am not a good liar,
even my words are shaking now.

slorr,you bluffing.
You not romantic one mah...

GAME OVER.I am finished!
No choice but to drink with Tye.

slorr,you lagging?
Or just daoing me??

no,I am wondering why is
the sky so chio tonight??

no no.
Don't try to shift the topic, Slorr.

Sigh.I give up.I asked for it myself.

actuallyI think relationships started from
cyberspace is considered as ROMANTIC,
cos romance gives people an impression
of unreal,and cyberspace is virtual...

slorr,that's interesting...

surfers keep a safe distance from each other
and usually 3 types of people
are produced in this way.

The first type...

The first type are those who present themselves
on net with their secondary personality.
Usually all of us consist of multiple personalities
and in everyday life,what we present
to the world is the primary personality,
with the secondary one being suppressed,
or maybe we don't even realise this
other trait of us deep inside.
So Internet is the place where
this side of us is revealed,
both intentionally or without conscious knowledge...

is it true?What about 2nd type??

the 2nd type are those who will transform
themselves into the kind of
man/woman he/she would want to be.
There's bound to be 1 or 2 characteristics
that you particularly admire,
too bad,sometimes these characteristics
just couldn't be found in you.
Cyberspace is the perfect location
for this transformation to occur...

slorr,you blowing cow,is it?Type 3 leh??

I am not blowing cow,
I read it from an article of TIMES magazine!
Type 3 will be those who transform
themselves into characters which are impossible
for them to become in real life...

example,if you are a girl,
you may act as a man on net.
You may even become
BATMAN or SUPERMAN if you want...

hmm...That's pretty amazing...

the first type is the faithful type,
cos its his own personality
that is being presented on net.

The 2nd type is the foolish type,
cos he knows only how to admire others
and always forgets his own strong points.

The 3rd type is the pathetic type,
cos he is wishing for something impossible...

slorr, then you belong to what type?Me leh??

i do not wish to believe you are type 3,
cos I am not...

crossed out the possibility of type 1
cos its too common,
because I think you are special.
Being able to attract you,
I think I am at least a bit special.
So we belong to type 2...?

type 2,then who you wish to become?Slorr...?

I certainly would like to become a person like Tye,
humorous, romantic and eloquent,
cos these are what I am lacking of...

slorr, what about me??

you?I don't know.
You want to FLY and DANCE,
probably that means you wish to fully
enjoy your youth while you can.
But if this is something you wish
yet you can't achieve,
then there are 2 possibilities:
1,you are aging,
2,you are leaving the world.

I think I said something wrong,
cos she didn't sent me anymore messages after this.
I began to blame myself for being so perverted,
why talk about these things?

I should have discussed with her
whether ZOE or FANN,
who should be the queen of Caldecott Hill.
Damn that TIMES magazine!
Poisons my mind.Maybe she is lagging.
So I waited... and waited.
Girl, its just a few minutes,
but it felt like several hours.
I want to apologize,
but do not know how to start,
until she sent me this message:

slorr... let's meet...?

Without hesitation,I used the hand that
I had used it over 19 years to wipe my ass,
typed oK

I am supposed to meet FlyNDance tonight 8pm,
at the entrance of McDonalds
the one beside YMCA.
That's the best time and place to meet a girl
you have never met before,according to Tye,
cos they would have taken their
dinner by that time which means
we can simply go inside the Mac
and have some fries and coke.

She will be wearing a whole set of
coffee theme attire
and I will be wearing my usual blues,
this is our way of identification.
She told me she is not those cute gals
I may think she is,I said never mind,
I am not Brad-Pitt either.
Then she told me she has long ago
given up on this hope already.

slorr, you are early...

While I was idling,
a girl tapped my shoulders from my back.

Although I was already mentally prepared
for anything that's going to appear in front of me,
I was still astonished by the girl
who stood in front of me now.

If not for the coffee theme and that slorr
I would think she is only asking for directions.
She is one of those chio bu
that can only be found on Orchard Road,
those I usually see while crossing the road.
Maybe I suffered from a serious concussion
due to the heavy blow,
but my mind was extraordinarily calm.

had your dinner right?
I think we shall go inside the Mac first?

you are pretty smart huh?
A good way to save money indeed...

AIYA!She knows me so well,
I can only give her an innocent smile back.

Since she is so pretty,I ordered 2 LARGE cokes,
and even ordered TWO packets of fries.

this time I treat, next time I'll let you treat..

I am not falling for that,miss.
But I am glad she mentioned next time

slorr,are you disappointed
when you saw me just now??

DISAPPOINTED?Are you drunk?

why do you think I will be disappointed then??

cos I told you I am not cute mah,
so you must be quite
disappointed when you saw me?

She is making zero-sense,
but I know she is just trying to hint
that she isactually cute.

then why did you have to lie that you are not cute??

slorr.I said I am not cute.
I didn't say I am not pretty...

#$%$##%^*&%$@!!!

but you are also quite decent looking what..
it's not like what you described to me too...

DECENT?A very vague word.
To many gals, decent=boring.
One good thing is that she didn't lie to me is
about the fact that she is has long hair.
She also has a fair complexion,
which reminds me of HL milk
I take almost everyday.

It is now only that I found out she is from ACJC,
but had spent her first 3 months in AJ.

Sitting in front of each other,
we talk about many things.
From her obsession with coffee
to my hobby of watching movies.
BTW, she had completely shook off
my misconception of if she is pretty,
she is brainless.

She appears to be an attractive girl,
both physically and character wise,
talking,and smiling to me,
occasionally being a little sarcastic and nasty.

It was like a dream.

We left the Mac at around 10pm.
Since it is still early,
I decided to send her home and fortunately,
its just Ang Mo Kio, two MRT stops from mine.

I would have second thoughts
if she is staying at Pasir Ris.

slorr,congratulations!
You are officially permitted
to date me from now on.

She said this before the lift door closed.

Back at home,
I realized that I hadn't asked for her real name,
maybe it's the influence of that stupid Tye.

Tye told me:
Never ask a pretty girl her name
the first time you meet her,
cos there are already too many wolves
out there dying to know,
so she will be more interested in you
if you act bochap.

Then why didn't she ask for mine?
Don't tell me there's a female version
of Tye telling her not to?

It is again 1 am.Time to meet her in AJCRR.

Slorr you tired??

Of course,I am tired after all the surprises
she presented me,
I would go straight for my bed
if not for her.
But why is she here also?
Is she not tired too?

long time no see,how are you??

slorr you siao ah? 2 hours only leh...
miss me??

A)Yes B)Of Course
C)Abuden D)Dying to see you
E)All of above. Answer is E.

Seems like she is really tired,
even the smiling face is
yawning to me right now.

you wanna go for a movie tomorrow??

Maybe I should ask her now,
while she is half asleep,
hoping that she will blur-blurly click oK?

should be no problem.What show??

HOOOOORAY!!
I am cheering for her fatigue.

we decide what show tomorrow.
Anyway what's important is watch with who.
Not the show.

Tye's favourite line,I am just borrowing it.

you should go sleep now lah..

wait one little while.
You haven't tell me you tired or not??

ok lah,a bit.You leh??

i am exhausted
but have to say good night to you first.
Slorr,if not I can't sleep...

me too...

I can't believe I am doing this
SILLY business right now.

ok I tell you what I count 1,2,3.
Then we log off together...

ok good night Slorr...

same to you...

one...

two...

three...


I never talk whenever I am inside a cinema,
and now is the best time for my mouth to rest,
so I spent the following 3 hours to admire this
much-talked-about movie of the century,Titanic.

I am not a romantic person,
so it is perfectly understandable if
I cannot really appreciate this motion picture fully,
except for all those stunning special effects.
But something struck me when Jack said to Rose
before he sank into the deep ocean...

rose, listen to me...listen....
winning that ticket was the best thing
that had happened to me...
it brought me to you...
and I am thankful, Rose...I am thankful...

Suddenly I felt much fortunate than Jack,
because I need not risk my life
to board Titanic,all I have to do is to
switch on my PC every night.

But he's one lucky guy too,
because he knows how to draw,
and just look at how slowly
he was drawing Rose,
that made me blame myself
for the lack of this talent.
But to her,this movie wasn't just about
drawings or special effects.
I noticed that packet of tissue paper
she was holding in her hand
and just when Rose said:
i promise...I will never let go,
Jack... I'll never let go...

She opens her sling bag and here comes
the reserve handkerchief.
Damn that Celine Dion,
why on earth did she have to sing that
MY HEART WILL GO ON at the end of the show???
for all the female species inside the theater,
it's like MY TEARS WILL ALSO GO ON

ok,movie ended. shall we go?

I stood up, speak to her gently,
worried that every single word I breathe out
might just crush onto her,and kill her.
She continued to sit on the position,
looked at me with her beautiful eyes
that just came back from a swim.

After a while,she said
slorr, movie ended,but life goes on.
Am I right??

I nodded my head.
But I just wished somebody might give me
some clue of what she was saying.
Finally we managed to leave Orchard Cineplex,
since its still early,
we decided to take a walk down the street.

Along the way,she seems unusually quiet.
So I guess Tye was right about the TITANIC FLU
he said that gals often got so mentally distressed
after watching this show,
and it is the best time to launch
an emotional attack on her,
that is why Tye had watch Titanic
for over 5 times roughly.

Her eyes were focused on the path or the crowds
but I know her mind was still left on Titanic,
sinking with her,
waiting for somebody to pull her up.

I just kept my mouth shut.
I know I am not a good swimmer.
We walked to Plaza Singapura.
Suddenly she stopped in front
of a Christian Dior counter.

slorr,have you read a novel called fragrance??

err..nope. Why do you ask??

look at this DOLCE VITA from Christian Dior.
It is what the guy bought for her girlfriend
in the story on her birthday.
And he told her DOLCE VITA is French,
meaning SWEET TIMES

She pointed to a bottle of perfume at the counter,
but I was more interested at the price tag
around the neck of the bottle.

oh... is it??

slorr,then do you consider today
as sweet times?

at first I do,but some points are
deducted since you started crying...

that means it can only be
considered a little bit sweet,
I shall buy the small bottle then.

I insisted to pay for the perfume
as her birthday present from me
since I know her birthday is coming soon,
this kind of saves me a lot of trouble
of finding a present for her.
Luckily, it is just perfume,
or I would have to pawn my underwear
if that guy in the story gives his girlfriend
a diamond or gold bar.

are you hungry?
Wanna sit down and have something??

i don't have any appetite,what about you??

you eat,I eat...

Her eyes are red again.
I am such a fool.
Finally got away from the noisy crowd
at the MRT station,
walking on one of the streets of AMK Ave 6.
Contrastingly,it is so quiet now that I can even
hear the rhythm of her heartbeat.

slorr,do you know what is the
correct way of applying perfume?

I shook my head.
In fact, I had never used perfume or cologne before,
medicated oil maybe.

first you apply some behind your ears,
then your neck and wrists.
After that spray some onto the air,
then walk through it.

sure or not?
In that case this little bottle
won't even be able to last you for 3 days...

slorr,shall we try??

we?You go ahead. I am a MAN

She opened up that DOLCE VITA,
behind her ears,
neck then the wrist she applied some
and she really did spray some onto the air!!

WABIANGZ!!Expensive leh!
Finally, she stretched out her hands,
facing up like enjoying
the raindrops falling on her face.

hahaha...

slorr, this is so fun! Now it is your turn..

She went through the same procedures with me
and I can feel the coldness of her fingers.
Maybe it is the perfume, I guess.

slorr, get ready, I am going to spray!!?

I imitated her.
Face up and walked through my first perfume rain.

slorr let us have another round!!?

?WHAT!! Serious??

My money isn't easy to come by leh!!
Before I can collect the broken pieces of my heart,
she had walked through her second round.
She was even more excited this time,
hoping around, like her nickname.
A flying and dancing butterfly.
Late night in AMK,
the street smells unusually nicer now.
Until we finished the whole of that DOLCE VITA.

DOLCE VITA is exhausted...

I guess this sweet time shall end now too.
Slorr, i will go up now.
Tonight 1 am,I will not be online,
and you are not to do so too...

huh? But why??

go online at 12pm tomorrow.
You will know... Remember, only 12pm...

She turned and walked into the lift.
At the same time,I saw an obvious pink patch
behind her neck,which is visible only now
because she tied her hair.

I looked up towards her window on
the fourth floor from below,
but it never light up.

I switched off the light in my room.
Engulfed in the absolute darkness,
I wished to have the same kind of
feeling as her right now.
I realized in complete darkness,
the easiest mood one gets... is loneliness.
She must be lonely right now,half asleep.

I almost can see a beautiful butterfly,
turning to ashes amidst the sea of flame.
And that patch behind her neck...
from pink it became red.Then burgundy.
Slowly, it swallowed me.
Was it the cause of that can of beer just now?

Suddenly I felt cold and shaky.
And that coolness seemed to have
come straight from my heart,
the rate of my heartbeat was an
exponential function of time
as it got closer to 1 am.

USE A DIFFERENT NICK!!

Checked...

She isn't there;my heart was beating fast.
But the temperature remained
below healthy level....

-=~@~=-

Finally,it is 12 p.m.
excited as I was,logged on the net,
yet there was still no sign of FlyNDance.
But there was a mail from her:

Dear Slorr,
At first, I thought it will be easier for me
to settle down in the darkness...
recollecting memories we have shared...
but all I felt was loneliness....
Can you feel it too?

I still can't change the
habit of logging on at 1am...
so I used a different nick to sneak into AJCRR...
you don't blame me right?... :P
you were not there...
should I feel glad for your obedience?
You said both of us belonged to TYPE 2...
the foolish type...maybe you are right...
cos I really do admire those
who dares to fight for their desires...
I stroke my hair gently when you said
that I am leaving the world...
and a few strands of hair fell....
No...doctor told me it is not a terminal disease...
and doctors are not supposed to lie!!?...
I still can live like a normal person...
BUT CAN I ?

FlyNDance...
is it really something I will be able to do?
After the first meeting with you at Mac...
I started to realize that you are not
only a virtual being living in the cyberspace...
in reality you are strong,gentle and sensitive...
I can feel the defense wall of
my heart slowly breaking apart....
I am defeated...I tied my hair today..
cos my fren told me that
I look more attractive this way...

I want you to remember my face as it is today...
cos after today...everything may change...
But why didn't you ask for my real name?
that is why I never asked for yours...

I am a girl mah.. :P
do you realized how I wish to have
something more than a nick
to take along with me?
Slorr...thank you for the DOLCE VITA.
Finally got a taste of what sweet times are like...
but I am really sorry.

I just could not bear to say goodbye.....

Since it started from a mail....
it should end with a mail too....
Its been 3 months and 2 days
since the very first mail...
not a very long time but it isn't short either...
our story began from me...and I will end it.

Maybe its what you said...
internet is fast and convenient,but it is not perfect.
I can send you my thoughts right away...
but not my tears...
It is about 5.30am now....time to go....
by the time you receive this mail...
I would be trying to settle down somewhere else..
I don't know...
Good Bye

With lotsa love,
FlyNDance

After reading her mail,
I felt as if I had just experienced a
roller-coaster ride which almost derailed.
She had shown me the other side of her,
soft and sensitive.

For a couple of months,
I was trying to hypnotize myself,
to suppress my feelings whenever
I started to think about her again.
Perpetually I was telling myself,
she is just one virtual character
that fly and dance in the net,
but never in the real world.


I became a fugitive,escaping from my PC,
escaping from the Internet and
anything that has to do with coffee.
Hide myself behind the piles of lecture notes,
behind the crowd of people,
trying to get rid of this thought
of missing something in life.

But I failed.
I found out that its not that I do not miss her,
its just that I had forgotten the passion
that always comes along when you are
having something hanging on
your mind all the time.
Its like I cannot breathe,
but it is just that I had forgotten the fact
that I have been breathing in and out
for the past 19 years.

I can hold my breath for a while,
but not forever.

I have to find her!

err...I am looking for...
er..FlyNDance....?

hUH?

huh?
this is the exact word
I was expecting from her.

She seems to be FlyNDance elder sister
20++, looked quite a beauty too
even without any makeup.
But of course, still cannot be compared with her.
I explained to her my purpose for
knocking on the door and told her
that I am no stalker whom she might think I am.

Surprisingly when I told her my disgusting nick,
Slorr, she appeared to be rather excited
and quickly she scribbled something on
a small piece of paper and handed it to me.

you should go and see her.SGH, Room 3-425.

-=~@~=-

This is the first time I have ever stepped into
the Singapore General Hospital.
It is a dust-free space,
everything looked so clean,tidy and arranged.

But I do not like the feeling it gave me...
I entered room 3-425,she was there,in a deep sleep.
I stood by her, watching.

Her hair was still as long as before,
lying across the soft, white pillow.

Her face looked roundish now,
I know it is the side effect of the medicine.
And the pinkish-red patch that was on her neck,
had spread to her face appearing
in a shape of a butterfly.

Nevertheless,she was still the
most beautiful butterfly I have ever seen.

Her eyelashes twitched slightly,
she must be dreaming,
what is in her dream?

McDonald fries and coke?
Sinking Titanic?
Or the rain at AMK Ave 6?
The room was getting darker
as the clock approaches 6pm.
I wanted to switch on the light.
I hate to see her lying lonely
under the shadow of a patient room.

But I am worried that the sudden light rays
might disturb her dreams.
While I was in a dilemma,
her eyes opened slowly.
Her eyes were wide on me,
then she turned away suddenly.

I can only see her back at this moment.
She lost weight.
After a long time,she turned to face me again,
rubbed her eyes and smiled...

slorr, you are here...

yes, nice weather today, right??

ya lor sky also very chio today?
Right? Heehee...

SKY VERY CHIO...

I can still remember this was the
conversation we had in one of
our AJCRR meetings.

But she did not realize that it is raining today.

slorr,why are you standing there.Sit down.

Thanks for reminding me.
I just found out that my legs were numb
due to the several hours of standing.

slorr, you lost weight...

ME?I thought I should be the one
who should be telling this to her!?

slorr,you hungry? Had your lunch?
Food here not that good.
That is why patients like me always slim down a bit.
Apart from that, it is quite ok.
But sometimes I feel really bored
without a PC here to talk to you...

slorr, how was your mid-year?
Sure did very well right??

WAIT A MINUTE!
You are the one who is lying
on the bed right now,not me!
Yet, I had nothing to ask her actually.

Because I was there to see her,
not to find out the answers to those questions.
Maybe now it is the time for me to utter
some touching lines like
what is in the case of a movie.

But I am not a Romantic person...moreover...

Movies are fiction.
Life is not.

-=~@~=-

I just wished that she could leave this place
as soon as possible back to AMK Ave 6,
back to ACJC, back to where she belonged.
And I promised she would not be alone anymore
because I will always be there.

After a while,her mum was here to see her.
Around the age of 50, slightly overweight.
Other than the cheerful smile,
she did not really remind me of FlyNDance.

erm, I think I have gotta go now.
Bye bye auntie...

you....You...

She sat up straight in a sudden,
like if she experienced a tremendous shock.

i'll be here again tomorrow...
And the day after tomorrow...
until you leave this place...

Before I went back home,
I went to Plaza Singapura again to buy that
Christian Dior Dolce Vita...
and I bought the biggest bottle this time,
that she can even swim in it.

I try not to close my eyes that night,
I want to go to her as soon as the first sun ray
shoots into my room....

slorr...you are here...
I have been waiting for you for a long time...

had a good night rest?

ah...I did not allow myself to fall into
a deep sleep because I know you will not
wake me up when you are here...

then you should take a rest now...

since you are here already,
I do not think I can.

I gave her the Dolce Vita,
and we agreed that we would dance in the rain
in front of SGH main entrance
the day she is discharged.

I dare not look straight at her,
because there is a butterfly on her face.
It was only last night before I leave SGH
that I found out she was suffering from
an illness called ERYSIPELAS.
What the clergymen would term the
BUTTERFLY DISEASE...

But what I like is the coffee butterfly
that is able to dance around freely
not that pinkish-red butterfly
that settled on her pale complexion.
Moreover, what is a butterfly if it cannot fly?

slorr,why are you looking
at me and not talking??

I do not know,
because I noticed that
she is getting weaker physically.
I had a bad feeling about this.

slorr, I am thirsty,
can you get me a drink??

I am not leaving her at this moment.
I can still remember a movie
about this guy who went all the way
to get red bean soup for his girlfriend
who was on sickbed and to find her lying silently
on the white bedsheet when he came back...
never to wake up again...

are you trying to get rid of me,
like what is in that movie??

slorr,movie is movie, life is life...

MOVIE? LIFE?...

but I thought you just had a drink...
Anyway, so what can I get for you??

Ultimate Ice Blended!!!

This is a hospital leh!!
Did she think I could find Coffee Bean
everywhere on this island?
Like McDonalds,what is more coffee
wasn't suitable for her at that time.

er...coffee isn't good for health,
order something else, ok??

so you know coffee not good for the body too.
Then you should cut down on your intake also, ok??

I saw her smile appearing and
there is a shine in her eyes.
I realized that she was just trying to tell me
not to drink too much coffee in the future.

My heart seemed to have
suffered from a heavy blow.

This is not good.
A taste of pH7 has started to fill my nose.
If this is not going to stop,
tears might be the next thing
that appears in front of her.

I recalled the chapter on reservoir
and dam in physics textbook.
Quickly applied the knowledge on myself.
Even if it is just a few droplets.

ok,I promise, I will try my best...

and try to sleep earlier in the future
and do not skip breakfast...

it is important to you
and do not be too obsessed with blue.
It makes you look troubled and... ...

This does not sound good.
It is like giving the final instructions
before she...
I cannot bear to let her continue.

ok ok,I will go get you a drink right away.

slorr,is the machine far away?
If it is,then its ok,I do not want it anymore.

From my mental calculation,
men would take 67 steps while
women would take 85 steps to reach
the vending machine right at that corner.
Plus the time taken to purchase,
average would take a total of 1.8 to 2.1 minutes.
Not very far.

quite near...

slorr,come back quick.
I do not want to be alone for too long...
I hate that feeling.

I didn't answer her.I just increased my pace....

*************************
*************************

xing ah... its late already... go to sleep...?
my mum was nagging at me again.

ok ok... 10 more minutes...

Until today,
FlyNDance had left for more than 2 months...

I still logged on at 1 am every night,
but onto channel DOLCE VITA
which was created by myself,
with Slorr and FlyNDance
being the only two nicks inside,for 10 minutes.

Although she won't be able to fly and dance
in real life anymore,I still wish
that she could continue to do so
in the virtual world.

Even Tye has given up on me...

she is gone, why are you still doing this?
For what?!!?

Yet,even if that is the case,
I cannot allow her soul to be left
at the corner of loneliness.
Because she said she hated
the feeling of being alone.

I still remember there was
a heavy downpour on that day.
When I reached SGH, they told me...
A coffee butterfly flew away from her room
at around 1 am last night....

After that... I cannot remember...

I just knew that I stood at the bus stop
for a whole day and I was all wet
because of the rain. Even my face.

I have been trying hard not to think of her
over these 2 months.
I have been hoping that her face will not appear
in my mind every moment that I breathe,
but it is like hoping that the sky is not blue;
the grass not green;
the stars do not twinkle at night...

Basically I was hoping for something
impossible to happen.
I cannot believe that I am of Type 2,
even in real life.

Did I cry? NO WAY!

I said it before,I am not a romantic person,
and this may be due to the
deficiency in the hormones
that constitutes emotions.
Whenever I had the feeling of pH7,
I will browse through those FWD: jokes...
Attention will then be shifted
by those dimwit, low-class jokes...

So now, everything is back to the way it was
before I met her 9 months ago...

Tye is still flirting around,
and I am still the old decent=dull me.
But I have stopped taking coffee and beer.

xing ah,is this for you??

My mum handed me a letter
she picked up in the mailbox this morning.

I was surprised when I saw
to slorr... written on the envelope.

That is for me I guess.
I opened it up,
there was a piece of writing inside,
and another coffee envelope.

Slorr,
I am FlyNDance sister,
I think this is how you are addressing her.
I am sorry that I do not know your real name,
although we have met before.

When I was packing her stuffs a few days ago,
I found this letter with
your name and address already written on it.

So I posted it to you,
because I believe this is
what my sister intended to do.

Best wishes,
Xiao Wen


The letter was sent 3 days ago,
and there was another:

to: slorr

Followed by my home address
written on the coffee envelope.
But this handwriting was a lot nicer
and the words seemed to be moving swiftly...
like in a joyful dance.

I have no time to figure out
how she has gotten my home address.
Did I give her in one of my mails?

I tried to control my trembling hands,slowly,
I open the envelope.
I found a photo,
and a half of a movie ticket inside.

Apart from these,there was a blue letter...
with the familiar DOLCE VITA smell on it.
The photo showed her,
standing on a piece of grassland,
wearing the same coffee theme attire
on our first meeting at McDonalds.

Something was written at the back of it...


Dear Slorr,
Coffee represents Pisces...that is me.
Blue represents Sagittarius...that is you
A blue letter inside a coffee envelope...
know what I mean?

Seeing me,do you feel like drinking coffee now?
Stop drooling! :P

FlyNDance


I smiled...bitterly.
The contents of the blue letter is simple:

If I have one more day to live,
I want to be your girlfriend.
Do I have one more day? No.
Too bad. I cannot be your girlfriend.
not in this life.
If I have wings,
I want to fly down from the paradise
just to see you. Do I have wings?No.
Sadly. I can never see you again.
If all the water are drawn out of the bathtub,
but it still can't put off the flame of love between us.
Can the water in a bathtub be drawn off?Can.

So yes. I LOVE YOU.

FlyNDance


My chest was torn apart...
tears broke through the dam
I constructed a long time go in a jiffy.

As proud,as emotionless as I was,
I cannot pull back the salty wetness on
the whole of my face anymore.

She has changed my little theory?
and gotten back what I have owe her-
tears for 2 months....

-=~@~=-

Titanic has won 11 awards in the Oscar,
including best picture.

Yet, Rose was not the best actress
under that category.
Therefore, if it is sad in a movie,
it may not be so fortunate too in real life.
And in reality,should Jack hold on to Rose
and never let go?

Maybe he should not be worried about this.
Cos that beautiful coffee butterfly
will continue to fly and dance in his heart..
forever...


~THE END~

:::If I Left You Out,Tell Me? =):::

[[**Birthdays**]]


~January Babies~

Dingwei 3rd
John 5th
Nashran 6th
Ken 7th
Shawn 9th
Zhiwen 9th
Eric Loh 16th
Kaijie 20th
Siling 21st
Genghui 25th
Ying 26th

~February Babies~

Kokleong 4th
Wallace 11th
Zhi Hui 12th
Mik 12th
Sausze 14th
Andrea 14th
Huizhu 15th
Darran 15th
Anuraj 18th
Danny 19th
Zhonghai 21st
Michelle 25th
Engsoon 25th

~March Babies~

Yongchiang 5th
Shihao 6th
Alan 9th
Ivan 12th
Selene 15th
MengFai 27th

~April Babies~

Jonathan 2nd
Boontien 7th
Desmond 18th
Liting 18th
Xiaotian 22nd
Huiyi 23rd
Yen 25th
Terry 26th
Terrence 26th

~May Babies~

Shengyng 3rd
Mark 6th
Richard 7th
Khairul 15th
Me!! 18th
Daoxin 19th
Stacy 21st
Belle 26th

~June Babies~

Jerry 2nd
Meijun 4th
Yinglu 4th
Hongchen 12th
Alphonsus 18th(DIDI!!)
Jackson 26th
Clarence 27th
Patrick 27th
Amos 28th

~July Babies~

Zhiyang 6th
Faj 8th
Hongtat 11th
Jer 15th
Suhui 16th
Adrian 17th
Joseph 17th
Ziyang 20th
Jiale 24th
Marcus 26th
Leon 28th

~August Babies~

Zhixiang 4th
Mingwei 7th
Yueqiu 15th
Edwin 19th
Chaowei 20th
Weixiang 26th

~September Babies~

Wanyi 2nd
Xianzhong 3rd
Mag 4th
Huimin 8th
Alex 14th
Zhi 16th
Yihui 25th
Guoyuan 27th

~October Babies~

Casper 6th
Daniel 10th
Aaron 10th
Stanley 14th
Derwin 15th
Ciwen 20th

~November Babies~

Sebastian 6th
Jon 10th
Shufen 25th
Wensheng 27th
Shundeng 28th
Melvyn 29th

~December Babies~

Charlene 2nd
Yinlong 7th
Joyce 21st
Eric Goh 22nd
Viedern 27th
Justin 30th